better days

better days
As I continue to experience God’s presence more and more in my life, one of the things that I have learned, whenever I feel down and burdened with worries legitimate or otherwise, is to say “all will be well.” But it’s not that easy every time.

Before I decided to write these thoughts down I was just snuggled tight into my pillow on my headboard feeling like i don't wanna think or even move, until the song Better Days (by Dianne Reeves) crossed my mind and I started singing it in my mind. And then I was suddenly aware that the lyrics was strikingly very apt…I mean I’ve been so familiar with the song’s lyrics being one of the most requested tracks way back in my CityLite days, not to mention being one of my favorite videoke pieces (hehe I told you I am a frustratd singer), but I never got to appreciate the wisdom of “Grandma.” Then I realized that subconsciously, I was trying to comfort my self with it and to give my self advice…in the absence of friends that I deeply miss… Grandma says:

“…Child we are all moons in the dark of night. Ain't no morning’s gonna come 'til the time is right. Can't get to better days lest you make it through the night… You can't get to know better days unless you make it through the night. Oh, you will see those better days but you gotta be patient…”

It’s not something new right? Patience... yes i know. But truth is suffering makes us impatient… and forgetful – forgetful of God’s promises and assurance of love. Well, in my case this was God’s way of reminding me, through a song, that He has not forsaken me… I am normal… I am human…and I am a Christian. This is part of my “growing pains.”

“…And although I'm all grown up I still get confused. I stumble through the dark getting bumped and bruised…”

I still haven’t gotten to the root, the core, the center of why I’m feeling this heaviness in my heart. I still have many questions about life... but then again I remind myself of the truth, the truth that even if I cannot feel it right now, I am loved by God and held safe in His embrace…

“…All the things you ask you will know someday. But you have got to live in a patient way. God put us here by faith, and by faith that means better days…”

I am just amazed how the Lord continues to surprise me with His own brand of humor and creativity. Truly, He knows me inside and out… he truly knows how to get my attention… and definitely, how to comfort me...

“…When night gets in my way I could still hear my Grandma say,(I can hear my Lord say) Be patient. Oh, you will see those better days…”

Yes I believe better days are ahead… all will be well.

Pebbles

pebbles
i am still floating...a little bit shocked i suppose ... i've just discovered things about myself, things that i never thought had such strong hold in me... well, i realized sad experiences don't just heal over time especially when they're not dealt with "humanly"... meaning feelings have not been acknowledged and faced...
don't we all have the tendency to rationalize them? "things happen for a purpose" or "i am not the only one experiencing this, there are those whose problems are worse" and the like? ... well, i do. it has been my way of coping...
and i was clueless that those supressed hurt and anger, no matter how my life has been coated with blessings, would have to be resurfaced and released. otherwise, it would continue to hold me back from beeing free, from dancing freely to the music of my life. as my sd would say "no matter how the master calls, his dog cannot come if it is tied in chains..."
my Master, in His goodness, desires me to be free. thus he is slowly breaking the chains that bind me. and i thank Him for the grace, everytime He does. also for the people whom He sends to help me... it is a bit painful but i believe it is for my own good... for me to be able to claim his promise of fullness of life and complete joy...

God Of Immense Possibilities...

Truly God is a God of immense possibilities... i used to be just content with friendster...as i create this blogspot i am reminded of the prayer of Jabez... "expand my territory"... not only am i exploring ways to serve the Lord using the gifts He has given me but i am also allowing myself to receive from Him, for Him to bless me in ways i have not yet known... :)